I think I have set a new record for me - I haven't blogged in over a month! I know, I am surprised too. ;)
The main thing to catch up on is the state of Colt's school. We got the devastating news last Monday that they would be closing Siskin's East Brainerd center. I can tell you that there has been very little sleep happening in the Doolittle household over the past week and a half. There have been many tears shed on my part. I am sure the other 115 children and their parents are feeling the same heartbreak we are. Unless you have been there, worked there, or had a child there, I don't think I can make you understand the magic of this place. The politics behind it are a little questionable and I am not going to get into that on here. They did tell us that they are going to expand and make room for a few children at the downtown location of Siskin. The president told us they have enough room to expand and make MAYBE three more classrooms, allowing room for 36 of the 116 children at the most. I was devastated. I just knew that Colt would not be granted a spot. There are other children that need Siskin and their services more, I know this. However, I also know that not just anywhere will work for Colt. I don't mean that in a snotty way, I mean that in an I-know-my-son-can-be-difficult-and-sometimes-needs-more-help-than-others kind of way. My fear is that he will again "fall through the cracks," if you will.
Tuesday of this week, after I had (kind of) accepted that there is nothing we can do to reverse their decision to close, I began calling, calling, calling every single place I could think of to find another place for Colt. I had narrowed it down to 5 places that Ryan and I could tour and see what would be the best fit. There are some amazing places in this town, but I just couldn't shake the feeling that nothing will be Siskin. I was calling out to God for Him to show us the right place to send our son. I was being offered many prayers from friends for guidance and answers too. Thank you all for that.
Well, yesterday morning my phone rang. It was the director of the Siskin in East Brainerd. She said that COLT WAS BEING OFFERED A SPOT AT SISKIN DOWNTOWN. What?!?!? I never, ever would have seen that coming. I feel like we have been handed a precious gift and I wanted to shout it from the rooftops. Ha. Silly, I know. I called the downtown location and spoke with the director there. She was very helpful. I was afraid they would only hold the spot for a short amount of time because there is a waiting list a mile long. People put their babies on the list BEFORE THEY ARE BORN. Crazy, isn't it? And we are being offered a spot NOW. We do want to tour a few places so we know we are making the right decision, including that location. Anyway, the director told me that she would hold Colt's spot as long as we needed and that they will hold it until Siskin East Brainerd's very last day if Colt wanted to stay until his school closed. I love that so much. I love that he can stay with his precious teachers, his precious friends, and that we can take all the time we need making our decision. What a precious gift.
Anyway, our prayers have been heard and answered. We now have options - a few amazing places to check out and now we even have TIME to make the right decision. I truly feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Thank you, God. Thank you, praying friends.
The House of Doo
Thursday, February 27, 2014
Thursday, January 16, 2014
My 2014 Goal.
I've never been one to make New Year's Resolutions, so I hesitate to call it that, but this year I do have a "goal" I guess you could say. I stole it from a former teacher of mine that has been through so much in the past couple of years. She blogged through it all and one of the biggest things I got from it was to "be present" in your life. Also, recently I saw a video that really hit me hard. I am bad about my cell phone, always having it, checking it constantly, and wasting WAY too much time trolling Facebook. Take a couple of minutes and watch the video here. I think so many of us are guilty of this.
Anyway, my goal is to be more present. The past couple of weeks, when Colt and I are at home playing, we have even turned the TV to a music channel instead of having mindless TV shows blaring in the background. It has made a world of difference in the way Colt concentrates. Duh. I should have done this more ages ago. We have played AND FINISHED so many games of Chutes and Ladders I can't even count. We have played trains and with his cash register for sometimes an hour at a time. That is HUGE for Colt! Last night, I got over an hour out of him SITTING AT THE KITCHEN TABLE coloring with me while our dinner cooked. Granted, every time the song changes he says "Is this?" He wants to know the name and artist of the song. Ha.
So, this year I will try to put the phone away and be present with my little boy. This even means TAKE LESS PICTURES because I always have that phone in his face taking his picture. Sigh. I take a million pictures, I know. I also know that he will not be this little forever and I want to try to capture as much of it as I can to show him later on. The struggle to capture the moments on "film" versus just logging them away in my head is real. ;) In twenty years, when Colt is looking back on his childhood, I don't want the picture in his head to be of Mommy with a cell phone in her hand. I want it to be Mommy right by his side, laughing, wrestling, joking, making cookies, snuggling, playing race cars in the hallway, coloring, painting, throwing the baseball, and living with no distractions because seriously, look at this face...
Anyway, my goal is to be more present. The past couple of weeks, when Colt and I are at home playing, we have even turned the TV to a music channel instead of having mindless TV shows blaring in the background. It has made a world of difference in the way Colt concentrates. Duh. I should have done this more ages ago. We have played AND FINISHED so many games of Chutes and Ladders I can't even count. We have played trains and with his cash register for sometimes an hour at a time. That is HUGE for Colt! Last night, I got over an hour out of him SITTING AT THE KITCHEN TABLE coloring with me while our dinner cooked. Granted, every time the song changes he says "Is this?" He wants to know the name and artist of the song. Ha.
So, this year I will try to put the phone away and be present with my little boy. This even means TAKE LESS PICTURES because I always have that phone in his face taking his picture. Sigh. I take a million pictures, I know. I also know that he will not be this little forever and I want to try to capture as much of it as I can to show him later on. The struggle to capture the moments on "film" versus just logging them away in my head is real. ;) In twenty years, when Colt is looking back on his childhood, I don't want the picture in his head to be of Mommy with a cell phone in her hand. I want it to be Mommy right by his side, laughing, wrestling, joking, making cookies, snuggling, playing race cars in the hallway, coloring, painting, throwing the baseball, and living with no distractions because seriously, look at this face...
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| Isn't he worth it? |
Thursday, January 9, 2014
Warning!
This is a long one, sorry. :)
It seems as though so much has happened since my last post! Some good, some not. I posted last on Christmas Eve, asking for prayers for my stepdad and mom. Well, as most of you know, Allen passed away the very next morning. Christmas morning. I hate that it happened then, but then again, when is it ever a good time to die? I hate that now we will all have that negative association with Christmas. (As if I needed any more. I am a total grinch.) I am, however, thankful that he is no longer suffering. My mom is doing as well as can be expected, I guess. The first few days were not as bad as I thought, but honestly, I think she was kind of in shock. She is struggling right now. She says she feels like the shock and numbness has worn off. So please, continue to keep her in your prayers. I stayed with her from Christmas day until the day after the funeral. I came home then because I couldn't stand being away from Colt any longer. We've been back since and Colt got to come. As soon as he walked in the house, his whole demeanor changed. He got really quiet and sat in my lap really still. Finally, he reached behind me and touched a blanket and so very reverently said "Pappy's blanket." It was. Bless him. I think he understood. :( Kids really do know more than we think they do.
Other than that, we had a pretty good Christmas. We all got more than we needed and ate much more. ;) Colt seemed to understand more this year, so it did make it a bit more fun for me. I wanted to give him his gifts so badly! I got to take a few pictures on Christmas morning but I never went back and looked at them. I finally looked at them on Tuesday (almost two weeks later!) and realized that almost every single picture is of nothing but Colt's smiling face. Seeing his smile was worth all the stress and irritation that the Christmas season brings me. I will post a couple of pictures below.
But first, I wanted to give another update on Colt. His speech is unbelievable. I have said it before and I will say it again - it's like a switch got turned on and he's just full of words! Sentences (sort of) even! He can repeat just about anything you can say, so beware. He will repeat it. He is even forming words on his own, pretty much all the time, and attempting sentences a lot! Sometimes it takes the patience of Job to not "rush him along" while he's fumbling through the words, but boy does my heart explode when he FINALLY comes out with something on his own! Listening to him work through the words is VERY similar to listening to a foreigner attempt to learn how to speak english. It's really adorable.
I mentioned on Facebook the other day that Ryan and I sometimes think that Colt can read. I know you are probably thinking that is ridiculous, but I assure you, he's got something crazy going on in that head. As soon as he started to talk, when it was still just basic sounds and people's names, he got this sudden interest in the logos on vehicles. It did not matter what style of car it was (car, SUV, truck, whatever), he could tell you who drove that "brand" of car. Any time he would see a Cadillac it was "Nana!" or Lexus was "Pawpaw!" or Mercury "Mimi!" or Jeep "Mommy!" You get the picture. He saw Leah and Daniel's new car ONE TIME and every single time after that, when he saw a Toyota, it was "EEEah!!!!" Even when he saw commercials on TV for those vehicles. It then turned into restaurant logos and would tell you with whom he had eaten at that restaurant. Soon, it was in the grocery store where he would point out who ate certain foods or drank certain drinks. Diet Pepsi was Gaga (granddad) or Diet Mountain Dew was Leah. Starbucks was Mommy! (smart boy.)
There are so many examples, I could write a book. Okay, now. The last time we went to visit my stepdad before he passed away, there was a binder on the coffee table with a logo on the front. Colt pointed to the logo and said "that says?" (We can't get him to say what, where, who, etc.) Anyway, my mom said "It says 'Tanner'" (That's the name of the hospital in their area) and Colt pointed at it and said "Tanner Hospice." IT SAID TANNER HOSPICE. No one had said it that day or any other day, not around him anyway. It was what got us wondering about his ability to "read" or recognize the way words look. Maybe he saw it on a commercial? In my car, Colt has been absolutely obsessed with listening to Garth Brooks. He's a huge fan. My car has a computer screen where the radio/navigation/etc is and it says the names of the songs from the Garth cd. It only shows three songs at a time, so you have to page down to see more songs. Colt's new thing is to tell me what it says on the screen, even if that song is not playing yet. For example, if "Calling Baton Rouge" is playing, it lists "Two of a Kind, Working on a Full House" and "Shameless" as the next two songs. Colt will tell me which song he wants to listen to depending on what "page" you are on at the time. If the song he wants is not shown, he will say "Go down" until he sees the song, then he'll point and say "Rodeo" or whatever song he wants! It's CRAZY.
It's almost like he's just now figured out that he can do this because CONSTANTLY he is saying "that says?" or "that place?" wanting to know what something is or what a certain word says. Yesterday, when I picked him up from Siskin, every single building we passed was "That place?" On Gunbarrel Road, there are a lot of buildings. I had never realized quite how many there really are. Also, his memory is unbelievable. If you tell him something one time, it's there for good. HE DOES NOT FORGET. It is scary, really. I guarantee you, when I pick him up today, he will tell me what all of those places were that we went over on Tuesday. We passed a new billboard on 75 the other day and Colt told me what it used to say - Tennessee Aquarium Downtown Chattanooga - with a question mark at the end like he was asking where that sign went. Ha. On Sunday at the Cracker Barrel, he asked his granddad what a birdhouse said "See Rock City." On our way to school, there is a Rock City billboard. This morning he noticed it and yelled "See Rock City at Cracker Barrel!" It is very exciting to know that he has these crazy abilities and terrifying too! What if I am not smart enough to challenge him?? Ahhh!
Anyway, I realize I wrote a book but I just find myself in awe of him and his abilities these days. He is amazing. I want to share his wins because so many of my early blogs were about all of his challenges. I truly feel like they have turned him into such a brilliant little light. :)
It seems as though so much has happened since my last post! Some good, some not. I posted last on Christmas Eve, asking for prayers for my stepdad and mom. Well, as most of you know, Allen passed away the very next morning. Christmas morning. I hate that it happened then, but then again, when is it ever a good time to die? I hate that now we will all have that negative association with Christmas. (As if I needed any more. I am a total grinch.) I am, however, thankful that he is no longer suffering. My mom is doing as well as can be expected, I guess. The first few days were not as bad as I thought, but honestly, I think she was kind of in shock. She is struggling right now. She says she feels like the shock and numbness has worn off. So please, continue to keep her in your prayers. I stayed with her from Christmas day until the day after the funeral. I came home then because I couldn't stand being away from Colt any longer. We've been back since and Colt got to come. As soon as he walked in the house, his whole demeanor changed. He got really quiet and sat in my lap really still. Finally, he reached behind me and touched a blanket and so very reverently said "Pappy's blanket." It was. Bless him. I think he understood. :( Kids really do know more than we think they do.
Other than that, we had a pretty good Christmas. We all got more than we needed and ate much more. ;) Colt seemed to understand more this year, so it did make it a bit more fun for me. I wanted to give him his gifts so badly! I got to take a few pictures on Christmas morning but I never went back and looked at them. I finally looked at them on Tuesday (almost two weeks later!) and realized that almost every single picture is of nothing but Colt's smiling face. Seeing his smile was worth all the stress and irritation that the Christmas season brings me. I will post a couple of pictures below.
But first, I wanted to give another update on Colt. His speech is unbelievable. I have said it before and I will say it again - it's like a switch got turned on and he's just full of words! Sentences (sort of) even! He can repeat just about anything you can say, so beware. He will repeat it. He is even forming words on his own, pretty much all the time, and attempting sentences a lot! Sometimes it takes the patience of Job to not "rush him along" while he's fumbling through the words, but boy does my heart explode when he FINALLY comes out with something on his own! Listening to him work through the words is VERY similar to listening to a foreigner attempt to learn how to speak english. It's really adorable.
I mentioned on Facebook the other day that Ryan and I sometimes think that Colt can read. I know you are probably thinking that is ridiculous, but I assure you, he's got something crazy going on in that head. As soon as he started to talk, when it was still just basic sounds and people's names, he got this sudden interest in the logos on vehicles. It did not matter what style of car it was (car, SUV, truck, whatever), he could tell you who drove that "brand" of car. Any time he would see a Cadillac it was "Nana!" or Lexus was "Pawpaw!" or Mercury "Mimi!" or Jeep "Mommy!" You get the picture. He saw Leah and Daniel's new car ONE TIME and every single time after that, when he saw a Toyota, it was "EEEah!!!!" Even when he saw commercials on TV for those vehicles. It then turned into restaurant logos and would tell you with whom he had eaten at that restaurant. Soon, it was in the grocery store where he would point out who ate certain foods or drank certain drinks. Diet Pepsi was Gaga (granddad) or Diet Mountain Dew was Leah. Starbucks was Mommy! (smart boy.)
There are so many examples, I could write a book. Okay, now. The last time we went to visit my stepdad before he passed away, there was a binder on the coffee table with a logo on the front. Colt pointed to the logo and said "that says?" (We can't get him to say what, where, who, etc.) Anyway, my mom said "It says 'Tanner'" (That's the name of the hospital in their area) and Colt pointed at it and said "Tanner Hospice." IT SAID TANNER HOSPICE. No one had said it that day or any other day, not around him anyway. It was what got us wondering about his ability to "read" or recognize the way words look. Maybe he saw it on a commercial? In my car, Colt has been absolutely obsessed with listening to Garth Brooks. He's a huge fan. My car has a computer screen where the radio/navigation/etc is and it says the names of the songs from the Garth cd. It only shows three songs at a time, so you have to page down to see more songs. Colt's new thing is to tell me what it says on the screen, even if that song is not playing yet. For example, if "Calling Baton Rouge" is playing, it lists "Two of a Kind, Working on a Full House" and "Shameless" as the next two songs. Colt will tell me which song he wants to listen to depending on what "page" you are on at the time. If the song he wants is not shown, he will say "Go down" until he sees the song, then he'll point and say "Rodeo" or whatever song he wants! It's CRAZY.
It's almost like he's just now figured out that he can do this because CONSTANTLY he is saying "that says?" or "that place?" wanting to know what something is or what a certain word says. Yesterday, when I picked him up from Siskin, every single building we passed was "That place?" On Gunbarrel Road, there are a lot of buildings. I had never realized quite how many there really are. Also, his memory is unbelievable. If you tell him something one time, it's there for good. HE DOES NOT FORGET. It is scary, really. I guarantee you, when I pick him up today, he will tell me what all of those places were that we went over on Tuesday. We passed a new billboard on 75 the other day and Colt told me what it used to say - Tennessee Aquarium Downtown Chattanooga - with a question mark at the end like he was asking where that sign went. Ha. On Sunday at the Cracker Barrel, he asked his granddad what a birdhouse said "See Rock City." On our way to school, there is a Rock City billboard. This morning he noticed it and yelled "See Rock City at Cracker Barrel!" It is very exciting to know that he has these crazy abilities and terrifying too! What if I am not smart enough to challenge him?? Ahhh!
Anyway, I realize I wrote a book but I just find myself in awe of him and his abilities these days. He is amazing. I want to share his wins because so many of my early blogs were about all of his challenges. I truly feel like they have turned him into such a brilliant little light. :)
Tuesday, December 24, 2013
Again...
I can't think of a title. :/
I just wanted to write a quick update on my stepdad. He is still hanging on but has hardly any quality of life left at all. It is so sad to see him lying in that bed. He is so skinny and looks about 90 years old and is only in his 50s. He can no longer stand or talk. I talked to Mom this morning and she said his breathing is starting to get labored. It will not be much longer. He doesn't really "see" you anymore, as his eyes aren't focusing. I hate this part. We watched this with my precious Nana and it was horrible. At this point, you know what is going to happen as it is inevitable and honestly, you just want it to happen soon and not drag on because he's suffering. My mom feels this way and is at peace with his death, however, she is going to be (is already, really) heartbroken. If you know my mom, you know it took a VERY long time and a lot of mistakes to get to the point of finding Allen and it seems so unfair for him to be taken from her. I also want to be very honest about her because I don't feel that it is something of which to be ashamed. She is bipolar - clinically diagnosed, not just "moody," among other things. So many people throw the term "bipolar" around very loosely. Anyway. She is bipolar and takes a lot of medication and care to try to keep it under control. Lots of things could easily turn it into a situation where she really needs help and losing a spouse could totally do it. I know she takes great care to try not to sleep during the day even if she couldn't sleep at night (this has happened lots lately) and if she does get her days and nights mixed a little, it can throw the bipolar disorder into a mess. I just want you guys to know exactly what to pray for when it comes to her. She needs prayer that she can get the rest she needs and be able to grieve without it turning into something that could - in a really bad case - require hospitalization for her. Allen was her support and her sanity, in many situations, and it is going to be very hard for her to handle this. I also ask that you pray for her to grieve in a "healthy" manner. God knows what I mean. As for Allen, please pray that he passes peacefully and soon, so he does not suffer long. He has been in a lot of pain and no one should have to go through that.
As for me, I ask that you pray that I am strong enough for my mom. Ryan and I (and Colt!) love Allen so much and we will desperately miss him, but we have to be able to be strong enough for mom.
Thanks for your prayers.
I just wanted to write a quick update on my stepdad. He is still hanging on but has hardly any quality of life left at all. It is so sad to see him lying in that bed. He is so skinny and looks about 90 years old and is only in his 50s. He can no longer stand or talk. I talked to Mom this morning and she said his breathing is starting to get labored. It will not be much longer. He doesn't really "see" you anymore, as his eyes aren't focusing. I hate this part. We watched this with my precious Nana and it was horrible. At this point, you know what is going to happen as it is inevitable and honestly, you just want it to happen soon and not drag on because he's suffering. My mom feels this way and is at peace with his death, however, she is going to be (is already, really) heartbroken. If you know my mom, you know it took a VERY long time and a lot of mistakes to get to the point of finding Allen and it seems so unfair for him to be taken from her. I also want to be very honest about her because I don't feel that it is something of which to be ashamed. She is bipolar - clinically diagnosed, not just "moody," among other things. So many people throw the term "bipolar" around very loosely. Anyway. She is bipolar and takes a lot of medication and care to try to keep it under control. Lots of things could easily turn it into a situation where she really needs help and losing a spouse could totally do it. I know she takes great care to try not to sleep during the day even if she couldn't sleep at night (this has happened lots lately) and if she does get her days and nights mixed a little, it can throw the bipolar disorder into a mess. I just want you guys to know exactly what to pray for when it comes to her. She needs prayer that she can get the rest she needs and be able to grieve without it turning into something that could - in a really bad case - require hospitalization for her. Allen was her support and her sanity, in many situations, and it is going to be very hard for her to handle this. I also ask that you pray for her to grieve in a "healthy" manner. God knows what I mean. As for Allen, please pray that he passes peacefully and soon, so he does not suffer long. He has been in a lot of pain and no one should have to go through that.
As for me, I ask that you pray that I am strong enough for my mom. Ryan and I (and Colt!) love Allen so much and we will desperately miss him, but we have to be able to be strong enough for mom.
Thanks for your prayers.
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Praises.
I just thought I would update on the way things have been going lately. Colt is in his fourth week of preschool at Siskin. I absolutely, wholeheartedly believe that this place is the answer to our prayers. In the past month, he has just exploded with progress! Every day it is something new. Something BIG! New words, new phrases, everything! He has even started saying things in response to us and he is HILARIOUS. On Thanksgiving Day, someone asked him a question (I don't know what it was now) and his response was "No comment!" Ha. This weekend he answered me a few times with "If you say so." Yesterday (TMI alert!) he had a bit of a raw hiney, kind of diaper-rashy and he said "Hurts so bad...butt doctor!" Hahahaha. Sunday morning, I went to get him ready for church and I had on a white button-up shirt. He pointed at my shirt and said "Doctor's outfit." Umm...okay. :) I love, love, LOVE this.
Another big thing that has just started in the past few days... he is PRETENDING! I know that seems silly. We put our Christmas tree up on "Black Friday" and he found a bungee cord that was around our Christmas tree box. He hung it around his neck and began holding one side by his ear and the other on our chests to "check for heartbeats." :) He then checked our ears for the "ear flu." I have no idea, but I LOVE IT. He loves all things doctor. And football. He has been running plays, yelling "First down!" and playing "touchdown" where he tucks the football up under his arm and tackles Daddy. He loved going to games at our old high school this fall and it was the most still I have ever seen him. Now, he watches entire games on TV and truly watches what is happening, like he's studying it.
A couple of nights ago, he spent about 30 minutes playing with cars and driving them all over, pretending to park them on his road map rug and setting up little orange cones and street signs. We just watched him in awe. He is, all of a sudden, a little boy with an imagination.
Yesterday, driving to school, he started to sing. That is the first time I have ever heard him sing. I tell no lies when I say it brought me to tears. Of all songs it was that STUPID "baby you a song, you make me want to roll my windows down and cruise" song. I HATE THAT SONG. The grammar is horrendous. Anyway, yesterday, it was the most beautiful song I had ever heard coming from that little mouth.
His behavior has made a 180. We were REALLY struggling and almost instantly after he started school, it changed. I don't know if it is watching the other children or that he's getting his energy out or what but it's amazing. Ryan picked Colt up from school yesterday and he asked the teachers if he was good. She said "He's always good!" What a change! He is truly a delight. Truly. I just cannot get over it. :)
I am feeling a little pressure to change the days he is in school. He goes Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and I am off on Mondays and Wednesdays. I miss him while he's at school, no doubt. At the same time, he gets to go three days rather than two, like he would if we changed to Tuesday/Thursday. I don't know what to do. For now though, he's loving it and so are we.
He has such a GIGANTIC personality and I am so excited that others will soon be able to see it like we have seen it for so long. :)
Thank you, God, for this beautiful blessing.
(My sweet fried Hillary at HMX Photography for taking this beautiful photo.)
Another big thing that has just started in the past few days... he is PRETENDING! I know that seems silly. We put our Christmas tree up on "Black Friday" and he found a bungee cord that was around our Christmas tree box. He hung it around his neck and began holding one side by his ear and the other on our chests to "check for heartbeats." :) He then checked our ears for the "ear flu." I have no idea, but I LOVE IT. He loves all things doctor. And football. He has been running plays, yelling "First down!" and playing "touchdown" where he tucks the football up under his arm and tackles Daddy. He loved going to games at our old high school this fall and it was the most still I have ever seen him. Now, he watches entire games on TV and truly watches what is happening, like he's studying it.
A couple of nights ago, he spent about 30 minutes playing with cars and driving them all over, pretending to park them on his road map rug and setting up little orange cones and street signs. We just watched him in awe. He is, all of a sudden, a little boy with an imagination.
Yesterday, driving to school, he started to sing. That is the first time I have ever heard him sing. I tell no lies when I say it brought me to tears. Of all songs it was that STUPID "baby you a song, you make me want to roll my windows down and cruise" song. I HATE THAT SONG. The grammar is horrendous. Anyway, yesterday, it was the most beautiful song I had ever heard coming from that little mouth.
His behavior has made a 180. We were REALLY struggling and almost instantly after he started school, it changed. I don't know if it is watching the other children or that he's getting his energy out or what but it's amazing. Ryan picked Colt up from school yesterday and he asked the teachers if he was good. She said "He's always good!" What a change! He is truly a delight. Truly. I just cannot get over it. :)
I am feeling a little pressure to change the days he is in school. He goes Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and I am off on Mondays and Wednesdays. I miss him while he's at school, no doubt. At the same time, he gets to go three days rather than two, like he would if we changed to Tuesday/Thursday. I don't know what to do. For now though, he's loving it and so are we.
He has such a GIGANTIC personality and I am so excited that others will soon be able to see it like we have seen it for so long. :)
Thank you, God, for this beautiful blessing.
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Soapbox Post!
Life has been really hard lately. Not only for me, but for many of my family and friends - close or in Facebookland. Some of the hardships are shared between us and some are individual battles. Some are current and some are ghosts from the past. Some have a mixture of both. Yikes. There is a lot of HURT going on right now. Everywhere you look, someone is hurting. You hear that you should always look around because someone else always has it worse off. No doubt, someone does. However, this doesn't make you hurt any less usually. To me, sometimes the most helpful thing is to have someone that I can vent to (I know that's grammatically incorrect, but it sounds pretentious when I reword it) and to have someone that I know will have my back or pray for me, sometimes without being asked to do so. A friend recently shared a link to a blog about having "a net." You can read it here. Basically, a net is a friend/family member that can "catch" you when you are falling. It's important that we have this person. It's so easy to sit back and say "Praying for ya!" when we see that someone is struggling, but do you REALLY say a prayer? Most of us do not, I would say. When I noticed the aforementioned friend was having a hard time, I thought to myself "You know, I really wish I could help, but I can't..." You know what? I can. I can take a few minutes to pray for that person and send them an encouraging word. So can you. It isn't going to solve anyone's problems or make everything okay, but it can uplift them. It can give them just a bit more strength to push a little harder. It can help them know they aren't fighting alone, that someone has their back.
I have been thinking about this for a while but that blog really hammered it home. I was thinking about how hard it is to be a mother, sometimes. Or maybe it's just a woman thing. We give and give and give and give until there is so little left of us and it's so easy to get mad, bitter, or broken down. We get very little thanks or appreciation in return because "it's our job" to clean the house, do the laundry, cook dinner, whatever. This is not directed at my husband, I promise, but it is true. I think if we think about it, most of us women/wives/mothers feel this way, at least occasionally. We can't expect men to suddenly change (though I wish we could sometimes!) because I keep hearing that they are "just wired that way." I'm not going to get into that crap. This is more about how I think we should stick together as women/wives/mothers and help uplift each other.
Everything about our ridiculous society says to compare yourself to someone else. Do better. Go bigger. Be skinnier. Make a better Pinterest project. Make your own soap. Cloth diaper and nurse until the children are 7. Come on. Most days I haven't even showered and my house is a disaster, but my child is alive and made it to his therapy sessions on time. I consider that a win! And I only have ONE!! My son is FULL-THROTTLE at all times, so you better believe when he naps, I lie down too. I usually read or nap. You know what? That's okay. I am so tired of feeling guilty about that. My son is EXHAUSTING, I am sure your kids are too. Why do we learn to feel bad about that? If I didn't rest when he did, I would be a stark-raving lunatic by the time my husband got home. Heck, sometimes I am even with a nap. :)
We have got to stop this crazy "I am not good enough" crap. STOP IT. You ARE good enough. Your children love you, even when you haven't showered. Now, stop beating up other people too. Don't even think to yourself that you would do something differently. You don't know that until you have to deal with it. Be supportive of people. Tell them you appreciate them. Tell them "Hey, you've got this. You can do this!" Tell them you are proud of them, thankful for them, love them. Be a blessing. It will help YOU get through your own hard times because, in return, someone will bless you. (See, it's not being totally selfless because you get something too!)
I have been thinking about this for a while but that blog really hammered it home. I was thinking about how hard it is to be a mother, sometimes. Or maybe it's just a woman thing. We give and give and give and give until there is so little left of us and it's so easy to get mad, bitter, or broken down. We get very little thanks or appreciation in return because "it's our job" to clean the house, do the laundry, cook dinner, whatever. This is not directed at my husband, I promise, but it is true. I think if we think about it, most of us women/wives/mothers feel this way, at least occasionally. We can't expect men to suddenly change (though I wish we could sometimes!) because I keep hearing that they are "just wired that way." I'm not going to get into that crap. This is more about how I think we should stick together as women/wives/mothers and help uplift each other.
Everything about our ridiculous society says to compare yourself to someone else. Do better. Go bigger. Be skinnier. Make a better Pinterest project. Make your own soap. Cloth diaper and nurse until the children are 7. Come on. Most days I haven't even showered and my house is a disaster, but my child is alive and made it to his therapy sessions on time. I consider that a win! And I only have ONE!! My son is FULL-THROTTLE at all times, so you better believe when he naps, I lie down too. I usually read or nap. You know what? That's okay. I am so tired of feeling guilty about that. My son is EXHAUSTING, I am sure your kids are too. Why do we learn to feel bad about that? If I didn't rest when he did, I would be a stark-raving lunatic by the time my husband got home. Heck, sometimes I am even with a nap. :)
We have got to stop this crazy "I am not good enough" crap. STOP IT. You ARE good enough. Your children love you, even when you haven't showered. Now, stop beating up other people too. Don't even think to yourself that you would do something differently. You don't know that until you have to deal with it. Be supportive of people. Tell them you appreciate them. Tell them "Hey, you've got this. You can do this!" Tell them you are proud of them, thankful for them, love them. Be a blessing. It will help YOU get through your own hard times because, in return, someone will bless you. (See, it's not being totally selfless because you get something too!)
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Prayer Request.
I meant to add this to my blog from Tuesday, but I forgot. :/
I wanted to update on my stepdad, Allen.
He has finished his radiation treatments for now and is waiting for a scan that will be done next week, November 6. He has been very sick. He has been falling a lot and the doctors say it is because when he stands, his blood pressure is dropping drastically. About a week and a half ago, Allen fell in the bathroom at their house. He fell between the wall and the toilet and Mom couldn't get him up. She had to call 911. :( They took him to the emergency room in the ambulance and gave him some fluids at the hospital. When he fell, he got some kind of nerve damage and now has no feeling in his right arm. He can't use it or feel it at all. They don't know if it is permanent or just temporary, but so far, the feeling has not returned.
This has been very hard for him, because as you can imagine, he has to depend on other people to help him. He is right-handed, so this was a big set-back. He has a hard time feeding himself and even going to the restroom seeing as it's hard to dress and undress with one hand.
We saw Allen recently and I have to admit, he looks bad. He has lost a lot of weight and is obviously exhausted. Please keep him in your prayers. He needs prayers for his health, but also for his spirit. I can imagine cancer would get you down and on top of that, he has the nerve injury that is requiring him to be very dependent. Thank you in advance.
I wanted to update on my stepdad, Allen.
He has finished his radiation treatments for now and is waiting for a scan that will be done next week, November 6. He has been very sick. He has been falling a lot and the doctors say it is because when he stands, his blood pressure is dropping drastically. About a week and a half ago, Allen fell in the bathroom at their house. He fell between the wall and the toilet and Mom couldn't get him up. She had to call 911. :( They took him to the emergency room in the ambulance and gave him some fluids at the hospital. When he fell, he got some kind of nerve damage and now has no feeling in his right arm. He can't use it or feel it at all. They don't know if it is permanent or just temporary, but so far, the feeling has not returned.
This has been very hard for him, because as you can imagine, he has to depend on other people to help him. He is right-handed, so this was a big set-back. He has a hard time feeding himself and even going to the restroom seeing as it's hard to dress and undress with one hand.
We saw Allen recently and I have to admit, he looks bad. He has lost a lot of weight and is obviously exhausted. Please keep him in your prayers. He needs prayers for his health, but also for his spirit. I can imagine cancer would get you down and on top of that, he has the nerve injury that is requiring him to be very dependent. Thank you in advance.
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