The House of Doo

The House of Doo

Friday, October 4, 2013

Answers, Behavior, and Frustrations.

Well, it has been an eventful couple of days.

First of all, we got the call from the geneticist this afternoon. Colt's Soto's Syndrome test was negative. We are not going to test anymore at this time. We don't want him to be a lab experiment. He has been through too much in his short life. He deserves a break.

Yesterday, Colt had a TERRIBLE day at his Mother's Day Out program and was sent home early. He went to his Mimi's house and was a bit of a monster there too. I was pretty upset about it. Not at his school, just the fact that he had acted that way. We have had lots of problems and bad moments, but yesterday was awful.

When he got up this morning, he had LOTS of green snot (gross, sorry) and the beginnings of That Cough that always turns into bronchitis. I made him a doctor's appointment for today. He has his second double ear infection/sinus infection in less than a month. While there, I had a wonderful conversation with Dr. Friddell. I asked him about Colt's recent behavior. *Cilla, this is for you too!* He said that children like Colt, that have these setbacks and delays often have a harder time than "normal" (what is that anyway?) kids. He assured me that his behavior is stemming from frustration, rather than a behavioral problem. He said Colt can absolutely tell that he is different and sees the other children being able to ask for what they want and he can't do that, which causes frustration. He then acts out, gets loud, gets mean, whatever. Dr. Friddell explained it this way: Kids like Colt that have delays, particularly communication delays, can behave one of two ways. They can reach out, wanting to be noticed and understood by getting out of hand a bit, or they can withdraw into themselves and almost shut down. We want the first one. His stubbornness is beneficial here, though it is difficult to know how to handle it. Dr. Friddell assured me that he would catch up and get over this, but until then, we absolutely continue to punish this unruly behavior letting him know it is okay to be frustrated, but it cannot be manifested in that manner.

So. I feel loads better in some ways and totally beat down in others, knowing that Colt is frustrated because he understands he is different. I hope we can learn how to show him that being different is a blessing sometimes. I am absolutely thankful that Colt is stubborn, determined, and acts out instead of giving up and shutting down.

Please God, let my boy keep those qualities for the rest of his precious life.


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