Do you ever have those times in your life when you feel like just one more thing is going to make you lose your mind? I am at that point, or pretty darn close. It's a bunch of little things and a few not-so-little things, but they are piling up quickly and my burden is heavy.
First of all, my windshield in my car is STILL busted, three months after it happened. Not serious, but a couple hundred dollars to fix. Also, my air conditioner in my car is broken. A FEW hundred dollars to fix that. It wasn't a big deal in the winter (haha) but it's getting hot. On top of that, Colt has bronchitis (again) and when it's hot, he coughs to the point of puking. I hate to make him ride in my hot car because it makes him cough. Bah.
Two days ago, we were outside in the yard and kept hearing a weird noise that sounded like someone was trying to start a car and it wasn't starting. Turns out, it was the air conditioner in our house. So now it's broken too. It was 77 degrees in my house when I got up this morning. Again, not good for the coughing/puking/bronchitisy mess. Dad came over the night we discovered it and helped Ryan take apart the air conditioning unit. They think it is just some kind of motor but who really knows. Also, who knows when it will get fixed. The motor has been taken out and has been sitting at the ice company waiting to be replaced since it happened. For now, it's hot at home but it's supposed to cool off soon. At least for a few days.
AND THEN. Sigh... You know we have the house that will not sell, so we have two mortgages. It's getting desperate around our house. Apparently, State Farm will not insure a house that is vacant. I had no idea. We got a nice little note in the mail the other day with a (very small) check for our monthly homeowners insurance stating they were canceling our policy on the house that is for sale. To insure a vacant house is OUTRAGEOUS.
Our new insurance makes us pay out the rear to even go to the doctor. The day we went to the eye doctor and got Colt's new glasses it was easily $350 out of our pocket. To go to the doctor last week, it was $100 out of our pocket for them to tell me he had "the same cold that all of Chattanooga has" even though I knew it wasn't that. Now (after he has suffered another week!) he's got bronchitis and I spent right under $100 to get more medicine.
I am absolutely frustrated and getting desperate. I feel like I am being punished for something and I cannot figure out for the life of me what it could be. Why does there never seem to be a break?
I just needed to whine a bit. Yes, it's all little things. Yes, we are all healthy (for the most part) and doing alright. We have a home and jobs and families and friends, but you know, sometimes life really kicks your butt. If you are going to make snarky comments, please refrain. I really might lose it on you.
The House of Doo
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Struggling.
I do not know what has been going on with Colt lately, but I swear to you I think he's been possessed by some monster-like demon. Or maybe he's just three years old. He and I have absolutely butted heads for about a week or more now and I am finding myself very, VERY frustrated and tired. He is testing every single thing I say and every single boundary I set. Just Tuesday morning I told him 'no' about something and he said "I don't like that!" "You don't like what?" "I don't like when you say 'no!'" Ah. Well, get used to it, little buddy. Is he just being three?
Also, let's talk about potty training. ALL NON-PARENTS CONSIDER THIS A FAIR WARNING. He has been doing great with potty training for the most part. We still struggle to get him to tell us BEFORE he goes, but he will go every time you take him. Sometimes he even makes it a whole day in the same Pull-Up! Well, all of a sudden the past week or so (same time frame as the demon possession) he has absolutely stopped all progess in potty training and actually gone backwards, if you will. Before, he was wearing "big boy undies" around the house and doing great, sometimes even telling us without us having to take him. Now, a few times this week, he's just peed in them and left puddles on my rug. I have NO IDEA what to do. Did I miss the "perfect timing window?" Did I do something wrong? Did I not praise him enough when he did do it right? I know by this point, most of his friends are potty trained or pretty doggone close. However, Colt has NEVER been on the same timeline as anyone else, so I didn't really expect him to be for this either. I just thought we would be closer at this point. We've been actively working on it for a good 9 months or more. What is the problem? What have I done wrong?
I have wondered about the school transition being hard on him. His last day at the other location was a week ago today. That was hard, also he's been in a new place this week, so that is probably hard. On top of that, he's been sick for about 8-10 days. He also got glasses 6 days ago. Could it be that he's sick/overwhelmed AND I am pushing him too hard? I have no idea.
Anyway, we are STRUGGLING. I have found myself in tears every single day for the past week over him. I have yelled more than I would like to admit. He knows I am frustrated and feeds off of it, it seems. I am trying to just pray when I get mad or find myself at my wit's end. I learned a long time ago, you never, EVER pray for patience. Instead I pray this - Please God, help me know how to parent this beautiful gift you have entrusted to me because I sure don't know how to do it on my own. So, if you get a second, pray for me. If you have any ideas or advice, share with me. I am officially desperate.
Also, let's talk about potty training. ALL NON-PARENTS CONSIDER THIS A FAIR WARNING. He has been doing great with potty training for the most part. We still struggle to get him to tell us BEFORE he goes, but he will go every time you take him. Sometimes he even makes it a whole day in the same Pull-Up! Well, all of a sudden the past week or so (same time frame as the demon possession) he has absolutely stopped all progess in potty training and actually gone backwards, if you will. Before, he was wearing "big boy undies" around the house and doing great, sometimes even telling us without us having to take him. Now, a few times this week, he's just peed in them and left puddles on my rug. I have NO IDEA what to do. Did I miss the "perfect timing window?" Did I do something wrong? Did I not praise him enough when he did do it right? I know by this point, most of his friends are potty trained or pretty doggone close. However, Colt has NEVER been on the same timeline as anyone else, so I didn't really expect him to be for this either. I just thought we would be closer at this point. We've been actively working on it for a good 9 months or more. What is the problem? What have I done wrong?
I have wondered about the school transition being hard on him. His last day at the other location was a week ago today. That was hard, also he's been in a new place this week, so that is probably hard. On top of that, he's been sick for about 8-10 days. He also got glasses 6 days ago. Could it be that he's sick/overwhelmed AND I am pushing him too hard? I have no idea.
Anyway, we are STRUGGLING. I have found myself in tears every single day for the past week over him. I have yelled more than I would like to admit. He knows I am frustrated and feeds off of it, it seems. I am trying to just pray when I get mad or find myself at my wit's end. I learned a long time ago, you never, EVER pray for patience. Instead I pray this - Please God, help me know how to parent this beautiful gift you have entrusted to me because I sure don't know how to do it on my own. So, if you get a second, pray for me. If you have any ideas or advice, share with me. I am officially desperate.
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Another Not-So-New Adventure!
This weekend was a busy one! On Saturday, we drove to Rome to see my mom and that side of my family to celebrate Mom's birthday. We ate at Olive Garden and then went to see my mom's new house. She is moving from Villa Rica to Rome and we're excited that she will be closer. While we were there, Colt got some quality playtime in with his great-grandfather. The house Mom bought has a playset in the backyard and we caught Colt and Papa playing on it. I got a really cute picture or two of Papa coming down the slide. ;)
Anyway, we had a great time. Mom's birthday was actually Sunday and she shares it with my dad's sister, my aunt Diane. We made it home from Rome in time to see her for a little bit at the farm. Colt got to drive the tractor with my dad, so all was good in his world. My dear friend and college roommate, Leah, came to visit this weekend too. She got there Saturday evening, and left this morning.
I am always thankful to have her around, but yesterday I was especially thankful because she went to Colt's ophthalmologist appointment with us. I knew I wouldn't be able to hold him down by myself, last time it took me and the nurse straddling him on the floor to get eye drops in his eyes! This time was a good fight, but with me, Leah, and the nurse we didn't have to get in the floor. Whew. However, it did take two rounds of drops to get his eyes dilated. Poor kid has really been through so much.
The ophthalmologist appointment went pretty well, besides the fact that it was 2 1/2 hours long. That was rough. I had a few things to ask Dr. Peterson about and he patiently answered all my questions. I have mentioned before that Colt does this strange head tilt thing when he's studying stuff up close, almost like he's looking OVER a pair of glasses that are not there. He didn't do it for Dr. Peterson, but he did do it for the nurse when she handed him some pictures to study. I was glad someone in the office saw it too. He thinks this is from his Nystagmus. His Nystagmus is very rarely visible anymore, but it never really goes away. We only notice it when he's very tired or sick or has been crying. He thinks Colt uses this head tilt kind of like a null point without it actually being his null point. I wrote a bit about that after our last visit with Dr. Peterson here. Anyway, he is indeed using it kind of like a null point, but he didn't seem concerned.
I asked about Colt's eyes drifting sometimes, and he did see it happen, but he isn't at the point yet where we would consider another surgery. He thinks the previous surgeries are going to stick. ;) I asked about Colt's clumsiness. I have been wondering if it's because of his less-than-stellar depth perception (common with his eye issues) or if he's just clumsy. Dr. Peterson didn't really have an answer to that. It could be associated with his eyes, but may not be. If it is his depth perception, there isn't really anything you can do about it anyway, so I guess we just have lots of Band-Aids handy. However, it could be because of his vision! We always knew he was a bit far-sighted (meaning he sees far away better than up close, the opposite of me and Ryan!) but this time, Dr. Peterson could tell just how bad by looking into his eyes. Colt also read an eye chart, but they use pictures instead of letters for small children. The last time we were there, Colt signed the answers. This time, he spoke them. :) Yes! We have wondered about Colt's vision for a while. He LOVES to put on my dad and stepmom's reading glasses, which are meant for far-sighted people to be able to read things up close. You know the type. He doesn't really do that with my or Ryan's glasses, but loves to do so with theirs. Now I know it's because he can see with theirs and not ours! His left and right eyes were quite a bit different in their prescription and that's kind of rare. We ended up leaving with a prescription for glasses. Again. We immediately left and went to Pearle Vision to order glasses because sometimes they take a while to come in. This will be Colt's third pair of glasses and the first two pairs were great, so we went with the same kind. The second pair was really the same frames just different lenses because of his prescription changing very rapidly as a baby. They are Miraflex brand and they are pretty much unbreakable. Only a few places in Chattanooga have this type, so we went where we got them last time. Colt first got glasses at 8 months old and everywhere we went he got a lot of attention over them. Maybe that's why he's such a ham these days. ;) The new glasses should be ready in about a week, but last time they came in much quicker. I am anxious to see how it goes. I got him to try on some other types of glasses, but he went back to these every time. They are kind of "goggle-like" and have a strap on the back to keep them from falling off during play. :)
Well, here's to another (sort of) new adventure! I'll post some of my favorite pictures of Colt in his glasses below.
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| Here Colt is saying "I catch you, Papa!" I love this! |
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| Look at Papa's face! Hahahaha! |
I am always thankful to have her around, but yesterday I was especially thankful because she went to Colt's ophthalmologist appointment with us. I knew I wouldn't be able to hold him down by myself, last time it took me and the nurse straddling him on the floor to get eye drops in his eyes! This time was a good fight, but with me, Leah, and the nurse we didn't have to get in the floor. Whew. However, it did take two rounds of drops to get his eyes dilated. Poor kid has really been through so much.
The ophthalmologist appointment went pretty well, besides the fact that it was 2 1/2 hours long. That was rough. I had a few things to ask Dr. Peterson about and he patiently answered all my questions. I have mentioned before that Colt does this strange head tilt thing when he's studying stuff up close, almost like he's looking OVER a pair of glasses that are not there. He didn't do it for Dr. Peterson, but he did do it for the nurse when she handed him some pictures to study. I was glad someone in the office saw it too. He thinks this is from his Nystagmus. His Nystagmus is very rarely visible anymore, but it never really goes away. We only notice it when he's very tired or sick or has been crying. He thinks Colt uses this head tilt kind of like a null point without it actually being his null point. I wrote a bit about that after our last visit with Dr. Peterson here. Anyway, he is indeed using it kind of like a null point, but he didn't seem concerned.
I asked about Colt's eyes drifting sometimes, and he did see it happen, but he isn't at the point yet where we would consider another surgery. He thinks the previous surgeries are going to stick. ;) I asked about Colt's clumsiness. I have been wondering if it's because of his less-than-stellar depth perception (common with his eye issues) or if he's just clumsy. Dr. Peterson didn't really have an answer to that. It could be associated with his eyes, but may not be. If it is his depth perception, there isn't really anything you can do about it anyway, so I guess we just have lots of Band-Aids handy. However, it could be because of his vision! We always knew he was a bit far-sighted (meaning he sees far away better than up close, the opposite of me and Ryan!) but this time, Dr. Peterson could tell just how bad by looking into his eyes. Colt also read an eye chart, but they use pictures instead of letters for small children. The last time we were there, Colt signed the answers. This time, he spoke them. :) Yes! We have wondered about Colt's vision for a while. He LOVES to put on my dad and stepmom's reading glasses, which are meant for far-sighted people to be able to read things up close. You know the type. He doesn't really do that with my or Ryan's glasses, but loves to do so with theirs. Now I know it's because he can see with theirs and not ours! His left and right eyes were quite a bit different in their prescription and that's kind of rare. We ended up leaving with a prescription for glasses. Again. We immediately left and went to Pearle Vision to order glasses because sometimes they take a while to come in. This will be Colt's third pair of glasses and the first two pairs were great, so we went with the same kind. The second pair was really the same frames just different lenses because of his prescription changing very rapidly as a baby. They are Miraflex brand and they are pretty much unbreakable. Only a few places in Chattanooga have this type, so we went where we got them last time. Colt first got glasses at 8 months old and everywhere we went he got a lot of attention over them. Maybe that's why he's such a ham these days. ;) The new glasses should be ready in about a week, but last time they came in much quicker. I am anxious to see how it goes. I got him to try on some other types of glasses, but he went back to these every time. They are kind of "goggle-like" and have a strap on the back to keep them from falling off during play. :)
Well, here's to another (sort of) new adventure! I'll post some of my favorite pictures of Colt in his glasses below.
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| Colt's very first day in glasses! |
Thursday, March 13, 2014
The Next Chapter.
We have finally made the decision about Colt's school. We decided to accept the spot at the downtown location of Siskin. I feel like it would be stupid NOT to take it. Obviously something about that place works for Colt. We don't know what exactly it is, but something works. The class sizes? The specific teachers (we adore them!)? The structure? The curriculum and routine? The fact that they don't use fluorescent overhead lights?!? I mean, heck, who knows. I guess it doesn't really matter, it just works. So, we are going to transfer downtown and pray it continues to work. If it doesn't, we'll be heartbroken. I wish, wish, wish his teachers were coming downtown too, but they are not. I can't say I blame them. However, we have Colt to think of and if it works, that's where we will go. Even with the decision to close the East Brainerd location (which I STILL DO NOT UNDERSTAND), this is an amazing, magical place.
So, our plan was to stay at the current location until they closed at the end of May. Recently, we were told by the downtown director that there is a spot open in a class that will fit Colt. However, there is only that one spot and if we don't take it and decide to stay until EB closes, we will have to wait until they get the new classrooms finished to start. That same day, we got a letter from the Siskin President saying those classes won't be finished until August. That would leave us with June and July without the structure and routine Siskin provides for Colt. Each time I drop Colt off lately, his class is smaller than the last time I left him. My fear was that with the more and more kids that transfer to other places with the impending close, they will close sooner than May 30th. With a very heavy heart, Ryan and I decided it was time to move him before we were left with nowhere to go until August.
Next week is Colt's last week at Siskin's East Brainerd location. In only 4 short months, that place has changed our lives. They have provided structure, routine, and stability to my son. They have provided teachers that love him more than I could have imagined. They have provided smiling faces and hugs at the front desk each time we have entered those doors. They provided me with reassurance when I left in tears on his first day. They patiently answered my check-in calls when he went through some uncharacteristically rough mornings and clung to my legs. They provided communication through a teacher fluent in sign language when my son of few words couldn't speak but could sign to communicate. They provided my nearly word-less boy with complete spoken sentences in four very short months. They taught him to sing his ABCs and to play musical chairs. Most importantly to me, they provided my son with CONFIDENCE.
I am sorry to see this chapter of our lives end. I pray the next chapter at the downtown location will be just as magical.
So, our plan was to stay at the current location until they closed at the end of May. Recently, we were told by the downtown director that there is a spot open in a class that will fit Colt. However, there is only that one spot and if we don't take it and decide to stay until EB closes, we will have to wait until they get the new classrooms finished to start. That same day, we got a letter from the Siskin President saying those classes won't be finished until August. That would leave us with June and July without the structure and routine Siskin provides for Colt. Each time I drop Colt off lately, his class is smaller than the last time I left him. My fear was that with the more and more kids that transfer to other places with the impending close, they will close sooner than May 30th. With a very heavy heart, Ryan and I decided it was time to move him before we were left with nowhere to go until August.
Next week is Colt's last week at Siskin's East Brainerd location. In only 4 short months, that place has changed our lives. They have provided structure, routine, and stability to my son. They have provided teachers that love him more than I could have imagined. They have provided smiling faces and hugs at the front desk each time we have entered those doors. They provided me with reassurance when I left in tears on his first day. They patiently answered my check-in calls when he went through some uncharacteristically rough mornings and clung to my legs. They provided communication through a teacher fluent in sign language when my son of few words couldn't speak but could sign to communicate. They provided my nearly word-less boy with complete spoken sentences in four very short months. They taught him to sing his ABCs and to play musical chairs. Most importantly to me, they provided my son with CONFIDENCE.
I am sorry to see this chapter of our lives end. I pray the next chapter at the downtown location will be just as magical.
Thursday, February 27, 2014
An Answer to Our Prayers.
I think I have set a new record for me - I haven't blogged in over a month! I know, I am surprised too. ;)
The main thing to catch up on is the state of Colt's school. We got the devastating news last Monday that they would be closing Siskin's East Brainerd center. I can tell you that there has been very little sleep happening in the Doolittle household over the past week and a half. There have been many tears shed on my part. I am sure the other 115 children and their parents are feeling the same heartbreak we are. Unless you have been there, worked there, or had a child there, I don't think I can make you understand the magic of this place. The politics behind it are a little questionable and I am not going to get into that on here. They did tell us that they are going to expand and make room for a few children at the downtown location of Siskin. The president told us they have enough room to expand and make MAYBE three more classrooms, allowing room for 36 of the 116 children at the most. I was devastated. I just knew that Colt would not be granted a spot. There are other children that need Siskin and their services more, I know this. However, I also know that not just anywhere will work for Colt. I don't mean that in a snotty way, I mean that in an I-know-my-son-can-be-difficult-and-sometimes-needs-more-help-than-others kind of way. My fear is that he will again "fall through the cracks," if you will.
Tuesday of this week, after I had (kind of) accepted that there is nothing we can do to reverse their decision to close, I began calling, calling, calling every single place I could think of to find another place for Colt. I had narrowed it down to 5 places that Ryan and I could tour and see what would be the best fit. There are some amazing places in this town, but I just couldn't shake the feeling that nothing will be Siskin. I was calling out to God for Him to show us the right place to send our son. I was being offered many prayers from friends for guidance and answers too. Thank you all for that.
Well, yesterday morning my phone rang. It was the director of the Siskin in East Brainerd. She said that COLT WAS BEING OFFERED A SPOT AT SISKIN DOWNTOWN. What?!?!? I never, ever would have seen that coming. I feel like we have been handed a precious gift and I wanted to shout it from the rooftops. Ha. Silly, I know. I called the downtown location and spoke with the director there. She was very helpful. I was afraid they would only hold the spot for a short amount of time because there is a waiting list a mile long. People put their babies on the list BEFORE THEY ARE BORN. Crazy, isn't it? And we are being offered a spot NOW. We do want to tour a few places so we know we are making the right decision, including that location. Anyway, the director told me that she would hold Colt's spot as long as we needed and that they will hold it until Siskin East Brainerd's very last day if Colt wanted to stay until his school closed. I love that so much. I love that he can stay with his precious teachers, his precious friends, and that we can take all the time we need making our decision. What a precious gift.
Anyway, our prayers have been heard and answered. We now have options - a few amazing places to check out and now we even have TIME to make the right decision. I truly feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Thank you, God. Thank you, praying friends.
The main thing to catch up on is the state of Colt's school. We got the devastating news last Monday that they would be closing Siskin's East Brainerd center. I can tell you that there has been very little sleep happening in the Doolittle household over the past week and a half. There have been many tears shed on my part. I am sure the other 115 children and their parents are feeling the same heartbreak we are. Unless you have been there, worked there, or had a child there, I don't think I can make you understand the magic of this place. The politics behind it are a little questionable and I am not going to get into that on here. They did tell us that they are going to expand and make room for a few children at the downtown location of Siskin. The president told us they have enough room to expand and make MAYBE three more classrooms, allowing room for 36 of the 116 children at the most. I was devastated. I just knew that Colt would not be granted a spot. There are other children that need Siskin and their services more, I know this. However, I also know that not just anywhere will work for Colt. I don't mean that in a snotty way, I mean that in an I-know-my-son-can-be-difficult-and-sometimes-needs-more-help-than-others kind of way. My fear is that he will again "fall through the cracks," if you will.
Tuesday of this week, after I had (kind of) accepted that there is nothing we can do to reverse their decision to close, I began calling, calling, calling every single place I could think of to find another place for Colt. I had narrowed it down to 5 places that Ryan and I could tour and see what would be the best fit. There are some amazing places in this town, but I just couldn't shake the feeling that nothing will be Siskin. I was calling out to God for Him to show us the right place to send our son. I was being offered many prayers from friends for guidance and answers too. Thank you all for that.
Well, yesterday morning my phone rang. It was the director of the Siskin in East Brainerd. She said that COLT WAS BEING OFFERED A SPOT AT SISKIN DOWNTOWN. What?!?!? I never, ever would have seen that coming. I feel like we have been handed a precious gift and I wanted to shout it from the rooftops. Ha. Silly, I know. I called the downtown location and spoke with the director there. She was very helpful. I was afraid they would only hold the spot for a short amount of time because there is a waiting list a mile long. People put their babies on the list BEFORE THEY ARE BORN. Crazy, isn't it? And we are being offered a spot NOW. We do want to tour a few places so we know we are making the right decision, including that location. Anyway, the director told me that she would hold Colt's spot as long as we needed and that they will hold it until Siskin East Brainerd's very last day if Colt wanted to stay until his school closed. I love that so much. I love that he can stay with his precious teachers, his precious friends, and that we can take all the time we need making our decision. What a precious gift.
Anyway, our prayers have been heard and answered. We now have options - a few amazing places to check out and now we even have TIME to make the right decision. I truly feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
Thank you, God. Thank you, praying friends.
Thursday, January 16, 2014
My 2014 Goal.
I've never been one to make New Year's Resolutions, so I hesitate to call it that, but this year I do have a "goal" I guess you could say. I stole it from a former teacher of mine that has been through so much in the past couple of years. She blogged through it all and one of the biggest things I got from it was to "be present" in your life. Also, recently I saw a video that really hit me hard. I am bad about my cell phone, always having it, checking it constantly, and wasting WAY too much time trolling Facebook. Take a couple of minutes and watch the video here. I think so many of us are guilty of this.
Anyway, my goal is to be more present. The past couple of weeks, when Colt and I are at home playing, we have even turned the TV to a music channel instead of having mindless TV shows blaring in the background. It has made a world of difference in the way Colt concentrates. Duh. I should have done this more ages ago. We have played AND FINISHED so many games of Chutes and Ladders I can't even count. We have played trains and with his cash register for sometimes an hour at a time. That is HUGE for Colt! Last night, I got over an hour out of him SITTING AT THE KITCHEN TABLE coloring with me while our dinner cooked. Granted, every time the song changes he says "Is this?" He wants to know the name and artist of the song. Ha.
So, this year I will try to put the phone away and be present with my little boy. This even means TAKE LESS PICTURES because I always have that phone in his face taking his picture. Sigh. I take a million pictures, I know. I also know that he will not be this little forever and I want to try to capture as much of it as I can to show him later on. The struggle to capture the moments on "film" versus just logging them away in my head is real. ;) In twenty years, when Colt is looking back on his childhood, I don't want the picture in his head to be of Mommy with a cell phone in her hand. I want it to be Mommy right by his side, laughing, wrestling, joking, making cookies, snuggling, playing race cars in the hallway, coloring, painting, throwing the baseball, and living with no distractions because seriously, look at this face...
Anyway, my goal is to be more present. The past couple of weeks, when Colt and I are at home playing, we have even turned the TV to a music channel instead of having mindless TV shows blaring in the background. It has made a world of difference in the way Colt concentrates. Duh. I should have done this more ages ago. We have played AND FINISHED so many games of Chutes and Ladders I can't even count. We have played trains and with his cash register for sometimes an hour at a time. That is HUGE for Colt! Last night, I got over an hour out of him SITTING AT THE KITCHEN TABLE coloring with me while our dinner cooked. Granted, every time the song changes he says "Is this?" He wants to know the name and artist of the song. Ha.
So, this year I will try to put the phone away and be present with my little boy. This even means TAKE LESS PICTURES because I always have that phone in his face taking his picture. Sigh. I take a million pictures, I know. I also know that he will not be this little forever and I want to try to capture as much of it as I can to show him later on. The struggle to capture the moments on "film" versus just logging them away in my head is real. ;) In twenty years, when Colt is looking back on his childhood, I don't want the picture in his head to be of Mommy with a cell phone in her hand. I want it to be Mommy right by his side, laughing, wrestling, joking, making cookies, snuggling, playing race cars in the hallway, coloring, painting, throwing the baseball, and living with no distractions because seriously, look at this face...
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| Isn't he worth it? |
Thursday, January 9, 2014
Warning!
This is a long one, sorry. :)
It seems as though so much has happened since my last post! Some good, some not. I posted last on Christmas Eve, asking for prayers for my stepdad and mom. Well, as most of you know, Allen passed away the very next morning. Christmas morning. I hate that it happened then, but then again, when is it ever a good time to die? I hate that now we will all have that negative association with Christmas. (As if I needed any more. I am a total grinch.) I am, however, thankful that he is no longer suffering. My mom is doing as well as can be expected, I guess. The first few days were not as bad as I thought, but honestly, I think she was kind of in shock. She is struggling right now. She says she feels like the shock and numbness has worn off. So please, continue to keep her in your prayers. I stayed with her from Christmas day until the day after the funeral. I came home then because I couldn't stand being away from Colt any longer. We've been back since and Colt got to come. As soon as he walked in the house, his whole demeanor changed. He got really quiet and sat in my lap really still. Finally, he reached behind me and touched a blanket and so very reverently said "Pappy's blanket." It was. Bless him. I think he understood. :( Kids really do know more than we think they do.
Other than that, we had a pretty good Christmas. We all got more than we needed and ate much more. ;) Colt seemed to understand more this year, so it did make it a bit more fun for me. I wanted to give him his gifts so badly! I got to take a few pictures on Christmas morning but I never went back and looked at them. I finally looked at them on Tuesday (almost two weeks later!) and realized that almost every single picture is of nothing but Colt's smiling face. Seeing his smile was worth all the stress and irritation that the Christmas season brings me. I will post a couple of pictures below.
But first, I wanted to give another update on Colt. His speech is unbelievable. I have said it before and I will say it again - it's like a switch got turned on and he's just full of words! Sentences (sort of) even! He can repeat just about anything you can say, so beware. He will repeat it. He is even forming words on his own, pretty much all the time, and attempting sentences a lot! Sometimes it takes the patience of Job to not "rush him along" while he's fumbling through the words, but boy does my heart explode when he FINALLY comes out with something on his own! Listening to him work through the words is VERY similar to listening to a foreigner attempt to learn how to speak english. It's really adorable.
I mentioned on Facebook the other day that Ryan and I sometimes think that Colt can read. I know you are probably thinking that is ridiculous, but I assure you, he's got something crazy going on in that head. As soon as he started to talk, when it was still just basic sounds and people's names, he got this sudden interest in the logos on vehicles. It did not matter what style of car it was (car, SUV, truck, whatever), he could tell you who drove that "brand" of car. Any time he would see a Cadillac it was "Nana!" or Lexus was "Pawpaw!" or Mercury "Mimi!" or Jeep "Mommy!" You get the picture. He saw Leah and Daniel's new car ONE TIME and every single time after that, when he saw a Toyota, it was "EEEah!!!!" Even when he saw commercials on TV for those vehicles. It then turned into restaurant logos and would tell you with whom he had eaten at that restaurant. Soon, it was in the grocery store where he would point out who ate certain foods or drank certain drinks. Diet Pepsi was Gaga (granddad) or Diet Mountain Dew was Leah. Starbucks was Mommy! (smart boy.)
There are so many examples, I could write a book. Okay, now. The last time we went to visit my stepdad before he passed away, there was a binder on the coffee table with a logo on the front. Colt pointed to the logo and said "that says?" (We can't get him to say what, where, who, etc.) Anyway, my mom said "It says 'Tanner'" (That's the name of the hospital in their area) and Colt pointed at it and said "Tanner Hospice." IT SAID TANNER HOSPICE. No one had said it that day or any other day, not around him anyway. It was what got us wondering about his ability to "read" or recognize the way words look. Maybe he saw it on a commercial? In my car, Colt has been absolutely obsessed with listening to Garth Brooks. He's a huge fan. My car has a computer screen where the radio/navigation/etc is and it says the names of the songs from the Garth cd. It only shows three songs at a time, so you have to page down to see more songs. Colt's new thing is to tell me what it says on the screen, even if that song is not playing yet. For example, if "Calling Baton Rouge" is playing, it lists "Two of a Kind, Working on a Full House" and "Shameless" as the next two songs. Colt will tell me which song he wants to listen to depending on what "page" you are on at the time. If the song he wants is not shown, he will say "Go down" until he sees the song, then he'll point and say "Rodeo" or whatever song he wants! It's CRAZY.
It's almost like he's just now figured out that he can do this because CONSTANTLY he is saying "that says?" or "that place?" wanting to know what something is or what a certain word says. Yesterday, when I picked him up from Siskin, every single building we passed was "That place?" On Gunbarrel Road, there are a lot of buildings. I had never realized quite how many there really are. Also, his memory is unbelievable. If you tell him something one time, it's there for good. HE DOES NOT FORGET. It is scary, really. I guarantee you, when I pick him up today, he will tell me what all of those places were that we went over on Tuesday. We passed a new billboard on 75 the other day and Colt told me what it used to say - Tennessee Aquarium Downtown Chattanooga - with a question mark at the end like he was asking where that sign went. Ha. On Sunday at the Cracker Barrel, he asked his granddad what a birdhouse said "See Rock City." On our way to school, there is a Rock City billboard. This morning he noticed it and yelled "See Rock City at Cracker Barrel!" It is very exciting to know that he has these crazy abilities and terrifying too! What if I am not smart enough to challenge him?? Ahhh!
Anyway, I realize I wrote a book but I just find myself in awe of him and his abilities these days. He is amazing. I want to share his wins because so many of my early blogs were about all of his challenges. I truly feel like they have turned him into such a brilliant little light. :)
It seems as though so much has happened since my last post! Some good, some not. I posted last on Christmas Eve, asking for prayers for my stepdad and mom. Well, as most of you know, Allen passed away the very next morning. Christmas morning. I hate that it happened then, but then again, when is it ever a good time to die? I hate that now we will all have that negative association with Christmas. (As if I needed any more. I am a total grinch.) I am, however, thankful that he is no longer suffering. My mom is doing as well as can be expected, I guess. The first few days were not as bad as I thought, but honestly, I think she was kind of in shock. She is struggling right now. She says she feels like the shock and numbness has worn off. So please, continue to keep her in your prayers. I stayed with her from Christmas day until the day after the funeral. I came home then because I couldn't stand being away from Colt any longer. We've been back since and Colt got to come. As soon as he walked in the house, his whole demeanor changed. He got really quiet and sat in my lap really still. Finally, he reached behind me and touched a blanket and so very reverently said "Pappy's blanket." It was. Bless him. I think he understood. :( Kids really do know more than we think they do.
Other than that, we had a pretty good Christmas. We all got more than we needed and ate much more. ;) Colt seemed to understand more this year, so it did make it a bit more fun for me. I wanted to give him his gifts so badly! I got to take a few pictures on Christmas morning but I never went back and looked at them. I finally looked at them on Tuesday (almost two weeks later!) and realized that almost every single picture is of nothing but Colt's smiling face. Seeing his smile was worth all the stress and irritation that the Christmas season brings me. I will post a couple of pictures below.
But first, I wanted to give another update on Colt. His speech is unbelievable. I have said it before and I will say it again - it's like a switch got turned on and he's just full of words! Sentences (sort of) even! He can repeat just about anything you can say, so beware. He will repeat it. He is even forming words on his own, pretty much all the time, and attempting sentences a lot! Sometimes it takes the patience of Job to not "rush him along" while he's fumbling through the words, but boy does my heart explode when he FINALLY comes out with something on his own! Listening to him work through the words is VERY similar to listening to a foreigner attempt to learn how to speak english. It's really adorable.
I mentioned on Facebook the other day that Ryan and I sometimes think that Colt can read. I know you are probably thinking that is ridiculous, but I assure you, he's got something crazy going on in that head. As soon as he started to talk, when it was still just basic sounds and people's names, he got this sudden interest in the logos on vehicles. It did not matter what style of car it was (car, SUV, truck, whatever), he could tell you who drove that "brand" of car. Any time he would see a Cadillac it was "Nana!" or Lexus was "Pawpaw!" or Mercury "Mimi!" or Jeep "Mommy!" You get the picture. He saw Leah and Daniel's new car ONE TIME and every single time after that, when he saw a Toyota, it was "EEEah!!!!" Even when he saw commercials on TV for those vehicles. It then turned into restaurant logos and would tell you with whom he had eaten at that restaurant. Soon, it was in the grocery store where he would point out who ate certain foods or drank certain drinks. Diet Pepsi was Gaga (granddad) or Diet Mountain Dew was Leah. Starbucks was Mommy! (smart boy.)
There are so many examples, I could write a book. Okay, now. The last time we went to visit my stepdad before he passed away, there was a binder on the coffee table with a logo on the front. Colt pointed to the logo and said "that says?" (We can't get him to say what, where, who, etc.) Anyway, my mom said "It says 'Tanner'" (That's the name of the hospital in their area) and Colt pointed at it and said "Tanner Hospice." IT SAID TANNER HOSPICE. No one had said it that day or any other day, not around him anyway. It was what got us wondering about his ability to "read" or recognize the way words look. Maybe he saw it on a commercial? In my car, Colt has been absolutely obsessed with listening to Garth Brooks. He's a huge fan. My car has a computer screen where the radio/navigation/etc is and it says the names of the songs from the Garth cd. It only shows three songs at a time, so you have to page down to see more songs. Colt's new thing is to tell me what it says on the screen, even if that song is not playing yet. For example, if "Calling Baton Rouge" is playing, it lists "Two of a Kind, Working on a Full House" and "Shameless" as the next two songs. Colt will tell me which song he wants to listen to depending on what "page" you are on at the time. If the song he wants is not shown, he will say "Go down" until he sees the song, then he'll point and say "Rodeo" or whatever song he wants! It's CRAZY.
It's almost like he's just now figured out that he can do this because CONSTANTLY he is saying "that says?" or "that place?" wanting to know what something is or what a certain word says. Yesterday, when I picked him up from Siskin, every single building we passed was "That place?" On Gunbarrel Road, there are a lot of buildings. I had never realized quite how many there really are. Also, his memory is unbelievable. If you tell him something one time, it's there for good. HE DOES NOT FORGET. It is scary, really. I guarantee you, when I pick him up today, he will tell me what all of those places were that we went over on Tuesday. We passed a new billboard on 75 the other day and Colt told me what it used to say - Tennessee Aquarium Downtown Chattanooga - with a question mark at the end like he was asking where that sign went. Ha. On Sunday at the Cracker Barrel, he asked his granddad what a birdhouse said "See Rock City." On our way to school, there is a Rock City billboard. This morning he noticed it and yelled "See Rock City at Cracker Barrel!" It is very exciting to know that he has these crazy abilities and terrifying too! What if I am not smart enough to challenge him?? Ahhh!
Anyway, I realize I wrote a book but I just find myself in awe of him and his abilities these days. He is amazing. I want to share his wins because so many of my early blogs were about all of his challenges. I truly feel like they have turned him into such a brilliant little light. :)
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