Special Needs or Just Special?

I have hesitated to post about this because I am sure someone will say that I am wrong, but I am going to post anyway. 

A while back, it was suggested that we take Colt to a pediatric neurologist and also a pediatric development specialist to see if there is a reason he is so far behind.  I spoke to our pediatrician and he agreed that it was a good idea.  We made the appointments, which are in February and March, because the neurologist is so busy and there is only one pediatric development specialist in Chattanooga at this time (we're going to call her a PDS because I am already tired of typing all that!)  I mentioned this to a health professional working with Colt and she told me that I should get a second opinion on whatever this particular PDS said.  I just kind of laughed and said "okay."  Fast forward about 2 months later, which was about 2 weeks ago, and it got brought up to someone else working closely with Colt.  A professional that I trust.  She suggested that we cancel the PDS appointment with our doctor here.  Basically, this is what she said off the record.  "This doctor WILL diagnose Colt as autistic.  She diagnoses every single child I have ever sent over there with autism.  Colt is not autistic (also what our pediatrician said) and she will say that he is.  You don't want him to have that label attached to him when he enters school, because they will put him in classes or with children who are and he won't fit in.  If they label him as autistic, he will NEVER lose that label.  Labels are good when they fit, but he will not fit but he'll never get out from under it." 

So.  We will not be going to see her in March.  We can always reschedule it in a year or two if there is still a problem, but for now, we're not going.  We are, however, still going to the neurologist.  Children with severe speech delay and multiple eye surgeries sometimes do have a neurological problem that links the two problems.  Dr. Peterson, Colt's eye surgeon, has told us from the start that his eye problem is really a brain problem, which is why the surgeries weren't working.  The last one "worked" because it made it hard or almost impossible for his brain to move them the wrong ways. 

Being around Colt alone, I honestly didn't realize quite how far behind he is.  Last week, we went to the playground to play and swing and get away from the house.  There was also a little boy there with his mom, but he was much smaller than Colt, though that isn't odd. ;)  Anyway, the boys were swinging side-by-side so I asked the mom how old he was.  He was a year old, about 4 months shy of 2.  So about 6 months younger than Colt.  When the boys got out to play and run around, it was super evident how far ahead of Colt he was.  He chattered and talked and climbed the steps and slid down the slides and jumped and ran.  Colt is VERY cautious in an environment like that.  That day, it just hit me really hard.  I know a lot of it is his eyes and the fact that he lived his first two years with almost no depth perception, but it's still hard to watch him in comparison.  I want to fix it.  I want to catch him up and make him be able to do what the other boys do.  I know he will get there, I know this.  When I got our paperwork in the mail the other day from our speech therapy group, it had Colt listed as "special needs."  That bothered me for some reason because I don't think of him that way.  Maybe he is, maybe he isn't. 

Honestly, to me, he is just special. 

No paci, snot, and kindness.

A rare two days in a row blog post!  Whoa!

Just thought I would update on Day 2 of no pacifier for Colt.  Kim said he yelled for about 10 minutes at nap time yesterday, so I was kind of wondering what was going on.  Surely he wasn't giving in that easily!  I was anxious to put him to bed last night to see what would happen.  The first night, he started crying the second he saw that his pacis were not in the bed.  He has slept with 3 for as long as I can remember.  He has one for his mouth and one for each hand.  Anyway, when we put him to bed last night, he started looking for them, but didn't cry.  We got completely out of the room and sat for about 2 minutes, then he started yelling.  No tears this time, just angry.  I can handle angry, but tears are harder.  He yelled for about 8 minutes!  He gave up yelling and I watched him on the video monitor, rolling around trying to get comfortable but the fact that he was awake and not yelling felt like a huge victory.  He went to sleep soon after and slept all night.  No lie, that first day was almost unbearable, but the second was a breeze in comparison.  I want to celebrate, but have this horrible fear it's not over yet.  There is no way we are that lucky, right?  We shall see!  I was proud of him last night.  :) 

Like I said yesterday, I have been paranoid about all this flu business.  This is about to get a little gross, so feel free to stop reading this paragraph now.  ;)  Anyway, the past two mornings and evenings, Colt has had some really thick gross boogies.  I just knew he was getting sick.  The thing is, he has no fever and his nose isn't running.  When he "talks" he sounds kind of congested, but like it is way up in his sinuses, you know?  So the point of this is, can 2 year olds get sinus infections?  Does anyone know?  Our pediatrician told us a while back, that babies don't develop sinuses until they are older, but my allergist disagreed.  What can you do about thick yuckiness up in their sinuses?  He can't blow it out, and we're doing the saline/snot sucker combo with only a little luck.  Suggestions welcome. :)  Again, sorry for the grossness.

Moving on.  My high school football team is playing tonight in the final round of the state playoffs.  If they win tonight, they play for the state championship at the Georgia Dome.  They do have the home field advantage and huge community support.  I really hope they can pull it off.  This is the same team that was attacked by the Freedom From Religion Foundation for praying before games and feeding the team in churches in the community.  That whole mess lit a fire in this community and within that team.  Maybe God's behind it, or maybe they're just a really awesome team.  Either way, I am proud to be a Ridgeland Panther.  Beat some Marist tail, boys! 

Tomorrow, I am having lunch with one of my best and oldest friends, Julie.  She came up with a wonderful idea of having a day of Random Acts of Kindness.  We hoped to do it before Christmas, but that may not work out.  My/our other best friend/s, Lindsey and Lauren are going to participate too, but I think they both have plans tomorrow.  Anyway, we're going to have lunch and plan out our Random Acts of Kindness day.  We're compiling a list of things to do and I would love to hear any ideas you may have.  The day before Thanksgiving, someone bought our family's dinner at O'Charley's. When we found out, we, in turn, bought another family's dinner.  That's what you are supposed to do, right?  Pass it on!  I am so excited about Julie's idea and can't wait to share it with you all.  Not to brag, but to hope it gives you all a bit of inspiration too!  Anyone else want to help?  Or do your own day?  Could be fun!  :)

I do realize I asked for suggestions on two completely different things...Getting rid of snot and Random Acts of Kindness. HA.  Today I'll leave you with a picture of last night's sunset.  I took it while driving (don't judge!) but definitely waited until I got home to Instagram it.  ;)  Enjoy!

New one.

It has been over a week since my last blog post.  I have slacked a bit and I feel like there is so much to update.  Now that I am sitting down to write about it, I am sure my mind will blank.  ;)

First off...BIG NEWS!!!  We went to Colt's eye surgeon on Friday and he said that Colt's eyes are perfect!  They were expecting to either do another surgery this year or to wait until he is 4 years old, but with the way they are now, he'll never have another surgery again!  As long as they do not change again.  There is always a chance that they can start to drift but it isn't likely.  We are thrilled with how gorgeous his eyes look! 

Charlie Chaplin?

I'll skip the boring parts and go right to the part where we took Colt's paci away.  Yesterday, the speech therapist found out he still had it (of course he still has it, he's only just turned two!!) and said he needed to stop.  Blah, blah, blah, something about how sucking a paci causes a kid's mouth muscles to not form/work correctly.  That sounds like a load of malarky to me, but whatever.  I guess it'll be easier to take it away now than it will be when he's older and bigger.  Our two options were to take it away cold turkey or to cut a hole in the end so it doesn't work and he won't want it anymore.  The latter is out because he chews holes in his pacis all the time and it doesn't phase him.  I went through the house, angry the entire time, snatching up pacis and collecting them.  Colt has them hidden in the house EVERYWHERE, but I tried my hardest to find all of them.  I found 15.  Ha.  Anyway, yesterday he screamed bloody murder for an hour and ten minutes at nap time because he didn't have his paci.  He threw everything out of his bed into the floor and just flat out cried.  It was the longest hour of my life, I think.  I was seriously hating people.  Then last night at bedtime, Ryan was gone to the farm so I got to put him to bed without it again with no one there.  I put him in the bed, screaming, and went to my room and cried.  He cried and screamed for 40 minutes and eventually laid down and went to sleep.  It can be done, but my gosh, it was hard.  I was kind of anticipating a long night of him waking up and crying because he didn't have it, but he slept until I had to go wake him up at 7:40.  He slept well, but when I woke him up, he had a really yucky nose and a cough.  Boo.  I've been a bit paranoid about this flu going around, so hopefully it isn't anything like that.  I hated leaving him to come to work today, but I am not going to lie, I am happy I don't have to put him down for a nap today. 

So.  Sorry that was so long.

I finished my Advocare 24 Day Challenge last Wednesday.  My official weight loss during those 24 days was 8 lbs.  I was hoping for more, but it did motivate me a bit to keep it up.  It feels good to see the numbers on the scale go down.The day after I stopped taking the Advocare, the numbers started going back up and I got pretty discouraged.  I gained back 4 lbs of it within 2 days of stopping.  I have since lost them and am back at the 8 lbs.  Not really sure what that was all about, but I am hoping to move on past 8 to about 40.  HAHA.  I am definitely eating better and feeling better.  I can tell that I have lost weight when I look in the mirror, but I don't think it's enough for anyone else to tell yet.  That will take a bit more.  I've got to throw some exercise in or I'll never make it.  My biggest accomplishment so far is that I have not had so much as a sip of sweet tea in a month.  A MONTH.   That is amazing for me, trust me.  ;) 

I also have a date and location for my Women At Risk, International awareness/jewelry party.  It will be a week from Sunday, on December 16 at my church, Chattanooga Valley Baptist in Flintstone.  The party will begin immediately after church at 12:15, as I am hoping to get more people since they'll already be at church.  If you are interested in looking through the stuff but can't make it to the party, please let me know.  I got an email saying they sent me 6 boxes today!  I can't wait to see what will be in these!  If you can make it, please do!  I want to make a difference and this is the only way I know how right now! 

I feel like there is so much more to post, but I should probably shut up.  I'll leave you with a picture of my cute boy enjoying his favorite activity...swinging!  Thanks for reading! :)

Weekly catch-up. :)

Well, again it has been a week since my last post!  It has been a busy week with Thanksgiving and all, so I'll try to sum it up quickly.

Our Thanksgiving day was spent in Rome with my mom's side of the family. I love those crazy people dearly and I look forward to Thanksgiving every year because of them.  I don't get to see them often, even though they only live an hour and a half or so away.  That's sad.  My fault, I must say.  We laughed a lot and the food was amazing, as usual.  I took a cheat day on my 24 Day Challenge, but didn't over-do it.  I am proud of myself.  I even held myself to ONE Oreo truffle.  If you have ever had one of those, you know how hard that is.  It was so worth it.  I was so happy to see them and to share my sweet boy with them.  He was sweet and funny, like always, but he had a lapse in cuteness right in the middle of dinner.  If you know him well, you know he pukes a lot.  I have no idea why, but at least twice a week, he throws up while he's eating.  He gets choked and gags VERY easily and it always ends in catching his puke in my hands.  It is NOT CUTE.  I forgot to ask his doctor about it at the two-year check-up, but honestly, I think he's just easily gagged.  Ha.  Apparently, I was a pukey child too, due to my allergies and excessive mucous.  Yummy, right?  :)  Not the traits I was hoping Colt would inherit.  Other than that little hiccup, Thanksgiving was great. :) 

Colt and his cousin, Zach.

I worked on Black Friday, but got off around 1:30.  I went to Academy, Dick's, and Target and it wasn't nearly the nightmare I imagined.  Granted, I didn't find any great deals, but I wasn't really in search of anything in particular so it was okay.  That night, Ryan and his best friend, Jody, went to my grandfather's property in Alabama to spend the night and get up early to deer hunt.  Colt and I had the house to ourselves.  We got wild and watched Mickey's Once Upon A Christmas.  ;)  Cute movie with a good message.  It's old school Mickey, not Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.  The good Mickey.I loved our snuggle time and he slept all night for me, like a champ.

Our snuggle time.  We love each other.

Saturday, Lauren came to hang out since our husbands were together and we took Colt for his first haircut.  I had heard good things about a place called Pigtails & Crewcuts, so we decided to check it out.  We opened the door and Cars is playing on the tvs by the chairs.  Colt's absolute favorite movie.  A sign?  ;)  Anyway, they let him pick which chair he liked.  He chose the firetruck with a bell he could ring.  They put the cape on and he immediately pulled it off.  That was not happening.  So, he went without and after that, all was well.  He tried to see what the stylist was doing a couple of times, but otherwise, he was very content to watch Cars and ring the firetruck's bell.  They took pictures for us, emailed them to me while we were there, printed off a couple, saved Colt's hair, and printed off a "First Haircut" certificate for him.  It was an amazing experience, especially since I was prepared for eye doctor-like meltdowns. ;)  His hair isn't too short, but cut off his curls (tear!), and trimmed up around his ears and forehead.  He looks so handsome. 

His precious curls are gone!!

We even got a trip to Hobby Lobby out of him afterwards!  Lauren and I shouldn't go to Hobby Lobby together. It gets expensive.  We got to watch the Dawgs beat the snot out of Georgia Tech and that afternoon, Ryan, Colt, and I decorated the Christmas tree.  Colt was not impressed.  He watched the Mickey movie again to occupy him while we decorated.  I've got to admit, our tree looks good this year.  It's usually a little Charlie Brown-ish, but I am happy with it this time!  Maybe the Christmas spirit is helping me put more effort into our tree. ;)

Sunday was church day, then lunch at Cracker Barrel, then naps, church again, then visited with my Pawpaw.  :) 

Yesterday, Colt and I got up and went to the mall and did a little shopping.  He was really good and patient, so I took him to the little play area inside the mall and let him burn off some energy.  We had Subway in the food court, then went to Barnes and Noble.  I love the smell of that store.  If there was a bookstore scented candle, I think I'd buy it.  ;)  He took a good nap when we got home, so I guess I did my job of wearing him out.  Last night we went downtown to Sugar's Ribs and listened to a friend play an acoustic show.  Colt loved it!  It wasn't loud, just Chris and his guitar.  Colt fussed for his guitar some, so Chris let him pluck the strings a few times.  That made me a little nervous.  Even after that, we were home and Colt was in the bed by 8:45.  What a day!  It was a great day.  :)

Playing at the mall.

Tomorrow, we have speech therapy.  I am curious to see what she'll do with Colt then.

Colt is doing great with his signs.  He has mastered the ones we learned last week, and he's even begun to string them together.  "Please more bites!"  I bought a book at B&N called the Baby Signing Bible.  I want to learn more!  He learned those so quickly, I think we need to challenge him a bit more.  At Sugar's last night, Colt would point at Chris's guitar and immediately do the sign for "please."  It was so cute.  :)  He's doing great! 

More!

I posted about this on Facebook, but I'll share it here too.  I am sure most of my readers are on my Facebook though. 

Yesterday, we had our first actual speech therapy session.  I was wrong before, we do get an hour with our therapist.  She comes to our home every Wednesday, except this week because of the holiday.  Her name is Jamie and I really like her.  Colt seems to like her too, so I am thankful for that.  She started teaching us some signs to use with Colt, so he will at least have some form of communication until he can verbalize.  We are working on "more," "please," "all done," and "bite."  He has mastered "more" and almost "please."  The other two not quite yet, but we'll get there.  I am just thrilled to have a way to communicate, even just a tiny bit! I am attaching a little 10 second video of him signing "more" last night, while asking for more pudding.  ;)  Sorry for the crappy quality, it was a cell phone video in the dark living room. :) 

More!!

Yay, Colt!  :) 

Our speech therapist said she honestly thinks Colt is "too smart for his own good."  She says she thinks he has figured out how to get anything he wants without speaking, so therefore he hasn't learned.  Pretty much what we suspected.  ;)  We'll see what happens!  I feel like he is so close! 

Attitude Changer.

Okay.  Well, today I am really struggling with my new birthday year and my good attitude.  That didn't take long.  I got really let down this weekend and it's hit me harder than it probably should have.  I am trying not to have that "I should have known better" attitude, but that's what I think every time I think about what happened.  Sigh.  This morning, I got some pretty discouraging news about some potential health insurance and I'm not going to lie, if we get that, I am not sure how we are going to make it.  SO.  Instead of sinking down into my disappointment, I am going to make a list of some things I am thankful for today, because honestly, I know things can always be much, MUCH worse.  With pictures (you know I am obsessed), here goes:

Obviously, I am thankful for this beautiful child.  I am obsessed with taking his picture, because I know he will only be this age for so long.  I want to remember as much as possible.  Every single detail.  I am thankful he is so happy.  I am thankful he loves music as much as I do!  I am thankful he likes to dance, clothed or naked.  I am thankful he is healthy.  I am thankful he is so very smart and charming.  I am just plain thankful for this boy.  He warms my heart on the coldest days.

I am thankful for God's beautiful creations, especially mountains.  I am wholeheartedly a mountain girl, particularly in the fall and winter.

I am thankful for sleep!  Also for a child who likes to sleep too.  ;)

I am again thankful for this boy, but also thankful he wakes up in such a wonderful mood.  Even with bedhead.  ;)

I am thankful for good music.  Any kind, just happened to have a picture of the Mumford album.

I am thankful for time spent in my grandparents' house.  It is not the same since my Nana passed away, but it will always be home to me.  Colt loved the piano.  Do you see the "ghost" by my elbow? 

I am thankful for flowers!  Especially for flowers given by friends.  :)

I am thankful for baby feet.  Beautiful, chubby, perfect baby feet.

I'm thankful for our furbabies.  I am thankful for the joy, snuggles, and fun they bring.

I am thankful for checkers, fireplaces, and rocking chairs at Cracker Barrel.  ;)

I am thankful for this hard-working man. I am thankful for the father that he is to our son. I am also thankful for UGA football and an aunt who doesn't mind sharing her tickets with us. ;)

I am thankful for fall leaves!  They're my favorite!

I am thankful for these two amazing friends.  I am thankful they put up with me and all the crap that comes with me.  I am thankful that they listen way more than they should.  I am thankful for their hugs, endless invites to dinner, and funny texts when I need them.  I am thankful we made it through so many years of school and living together in college.  Whew.  Having friends that have been around for over 20 years is pretty impressive for a 29 year old, don't you think?  I am a lucky, lucky girl.

I am thankful for this man.  I am thankful for a dad who stuck around as a single parent, when it was probably easier to leave.  I am thankful for the Christian example he is for me and my family.  I am thankful for his never-ending patience with me.  I am thankful for his (and Judy's!) generosity, for helping us provide the surgeries needed for our son, without leaving us thousands of dollars in debt.  I am thankful for their willingness to help, always.  I am thankful that my dad taught me what kind of man to marry and for setting my standards high from the start.  I have the best dad in the world, no doubt.

I am thankful to call this beautiful city "home."  Chattanooga is such a fun, family-friendly, artsy, creative, thriving city.  We are so blessed! 

 

 

Alright.  I feel better.  There are sooooo many more things that I am thankful for, but if I were to list them all, this post would be a mile long.  You'd definitely not read the entire thing.  I hope you did.  Feel free to share things you are thankful for too.  I'd love to hear them.  

The big 2-9.

Well, it's my birthday.  I am 29 today.  One last year in my twenties.  This past week or so, I have had a bit of a revelation.  I want this year to be a big one.  A different one.  I am hoping for big changes, even if it is only in the way I look at things and at my life.  I am notorious for talking a big game, then slacking off so I am hopeful that this blog will help to hold me accountable.  Please, hold me accountable.  My few faithful readers, I will need your help and encouragement. 

I want this year to be about others.  I want to quit looking in and focus on looking out.  I want to serve others.  I want to be a friend.  I want to be a doer.  I want to change the world even just a tiny bit, for the better.  I want to take care of me, so that I can better take care of others.  I want to watch what I eat and exercise, so I can chase my very active two year old all over the neighborhood and not just cheer him on from a chair on the sidelines.  I want to move forward with this human trafficking stuff that is weighing so heavily on my heart.  I want to have a positive attitude and lose the bad one I have had for so many years.  I have been praying daily that God will help me to have a better attitude and think before I react.  I've never been good at that.  ;) 

I want to volunteer at the community kitchen.  I want to simplify my home and get rid of unnecessary STUFF that so many others could benefit from, instead of it just cluttering up our space.  I will put down my phone less and hug my baby boy more.  I want him to see me as a good example and not one that only cares about myself.  Something has got to change.  I'm hoping this is the year. 

So.  Here we go.  Wish me luck!

Snuggling my wiggly boy.